Day 30: A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.
Dear Mallori,
First off, I am so proud of you for being brave in exposing so many things about you, your life, your background, and your hopes for the future. I must be honest with you, at first I didn't know if you'd be able to make it through it all. I'm so glad you did, because all along the way you made a lot of self discoveries that will help you grow exponentially as a person. You should definitely do this again in 5-10 years.
With that being said, I am just going to list off everything I love about you. I don't want to explain them all.
Here goes...
The color of your eyes, your height, your teeth, your smile, your hair, your ability to be completely serious when you need to be and the ability to be as goofy as you want, your drive for your education, the way you love your family, the way you love your friends, the passion you have towards things that make you happy, the way you complete things when you set out to do them, how much you love running and reffing, the way you never did let people in your past bring you down,
AND FINALLY,
I love that you know exactly who you are, what you want to become, what will make you happy, and how you will not change any of it for anyone but yourself.
You rock girl!
-Mal :)
Okay, that felt a little narcissistic. But it's all true :-S
Showing posts with label 30 Days of Truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 30 Days of Truth. Show all posts
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Saturday, February 12, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 29
Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself, and why.
I don't mean to sound like I'm conceited, but honestly overall I am pleased with myself. It has been a difficult journey getting to where I am now, but it's definitely worth it.
With that being said there are two things I'd like to change.
1. I'd like to see clear skin when I look in the mirror every day.
2. I'd like to lose about 20 lbs within a year.
I want to change the first one because it really sucks being 23 and having acne problems. Since I have fairly good skin otherwise, I never learned how to put on makeup properly so I can't really cover it up that way. And I'm tired of getting new scars on my face from it.
I'd like to lose the weight because I feel that the weight it would put me at would just be a healthier option for me. If I only drop 10 pounds, well that still puts me at something a little more healthy than where I am now. My overall goal is to have a long, happy, healthy life, and being heavier than I should be would prevent me from being able to do that.
I honestly think that once I graduate from college and get into a healthier lifestyle that the weight won't be an issue. I know the things I'm doing wrong now, but it's super difficult to change when I have the 500 thousand stressors from being a student. Only 91 days!
I don't mean to sound like I'm conceited, but honestly overall I am pleased with myself. It has been a difficult journey getting to where I am now, but it's definitely worth it.
With that being said there are two things I'd like to change.
1. I'd like to see clear skin when I look in the mirror every day.
2. I'd like to lose about 20 lbs within a year.
I want to change the first one because it really sucks being 23 and having acne problems. Since I have fairly good skin otherwise, I never learned how to put on makeup properly so I can't really cover it up that way. And I'm tired of getting new scars on my face from it.
I'd like to lose the weight because I feel that the weight it would put me at would just be a healthier option for me. If I only drop 10 pounds, well that still puts me at something a little more healthy than where I am now. My overall goal is to have a long, happy, healthy life, and being heavier than I should be would prevent me from being able to do that.
I honestly think that once I graduate from college and get into a healthier lifestyle that the weight won't be an issue. I know the things I'm doing wrong now, but it's super difficult to change when I have the 500 thousand stressors from being a student. Only 91 days!
Friday, February 11, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 28
Day 28: What if you were pregnant, or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
First off, I can't get someone pregnant (sorry, wanted to throw a little humor in there).
This one is a little iffy. If you had asked me this six months ago, it would have been a simple answer, one most wouldn't agree with. But now, now that I am ninety-two days away from graduation, it's a pretty easy answer. I mean, I wouldn't be showing by the time I graduate. So my answer to being pregnant is this: I would give someone else the opportunity to raise this child. It's not that I don't want to have children (well, I kind of just want to adopt), but I am just not at all in a place that I could give this child a decent life.
I really think that I would want it to be a closed adoption. I wouldn't want to put that kind of stress on the adoptive parents, always wondering if their child is going to leave them in search for their birth mother. I don't want my children to struggle financially. It would be irresponsible of me to try to raise a child while I'm still trying to figure out what it is that I want to do with my life.
However, seeing as how I am not married nor do I have a boyfriend, the chances of me getting pregnant are slim to none :)
First off, I can't get someone pregnant (sorry, wanted to throw a little humor in there).
This one is a little iffy. If you had asked me this six months ago, it would have been a simple answer, one most wouldn't agree with. But now, now that I am ninety-two days away from graduation, it's a pretty easy answer. I mean, I wouldn't be showing by the time I graduate. So my answer to being pregnant is this: I would give someone else the opportunity to raise this child. It's not that I don't want to have children (well, I kind of just want to adopt), but I am just not at all in a place that I could give this child a decent life.
I really think that I would want it to be a closed adoption. I wouldn't want to put that kind of stress on the adoptive parents, always wondering if their child is going to leave them in search for their birth mother. I don't want my children to struggle financially. It would be irresponsible of me to try to raise a child while I'm still trying to figure out what it is that I want to do with my life.
However, seeing as how I am not married nor do I have a boyfriend, the chances of me getting pregnant are slim to none :)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 27
Day 27: What's the best thing going for you right now?
It's so hard to pick ONE THING that is the best thing going for you right now. I have been stuck on this truth for quite some time, and I still am not sure what is the best thing going for me.
If I had to just throw something out there, I would say it's being young and having no responsibilities. I will be graduating from college in May, and I don't have a serious boyfriend, I'm not married, and I don't have children. Both of my brothers will have graduated from high school by June. I love my family, I love spending time with them, but they also want me to go out and live and make my own mistakes and do what it is that makes me happy (I'm so blessed to have the family I do!). So basically, I have nothing tying me down once I graduate. Yes, I do want to continue my education and go to nursing school, but that necessarily doesn't have to happen right away.
I applied to Teach for America. The program basically takes college graduates and puts them into lower-income communities all across America and prepare them for teaching to help eliminate the social differences in education. I do not necessarily feel like I am "called" to be a teacher, but I want to be an example to students across the nation that it doesn't matter where you grew up, a higher education IS possible. I grew up in three different low income communities, and here I am about to be a college grad.
Since I have no real responsibilities just yet, I am able to pack up my things and go teach somewhere for a couple years before I begin nursing school. I'm really excited about the possibility, but I'm trying not to get too excited because there is no guarantee I will be chosen for the program.
It's so hard to pick ONE THING that is the best thing going for you right now. I have been stuck on this truth for quite some time, and I still am not sure what is the best thing going for me.
If I had to just throw something out there, I would say it's being young and having no responsibilities. I will be graduating from college in May, and I don't have a serious boyfriend, I'm not married, and I don't have children. Both of my brothers will have graduated from high school by June. I love my family, I love spending time with them, but they also want me to go out and live and make my own mistakes and do what it is that makes me happy (I'm so blessed to have the family I do!). So basically, I have nothing tying me down once I graduate. Yes, I do want to continue my education and go to nursing school, but that necessarily doesn't have to happen right away.
I applied to Teach for America. The program basically takes college graduates and puts them into lower-income communities all across America and prepare them for teaching to help eliminate the social differences in education. I do not necessarily feel like I am "called" to be a teacher, but I want to be an example to students across the nation that it doesn't matter where you grew up, a higher education IS possible. I grew up in three different low income communities, and here I am about to be a college grad.
Since I have no real responsibilities just yet, I am able to pack up my things and go teach somewhere for a couple years before I begin nursing school. I'm really excited about the possibility, but I'm trying not to get too excited because there is no guarantee I will be chosen for the program.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 26
Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
I unfortunately can answer yes to the first question. I know, some of you may be thinking "Mal, you're only 23! What on earth has happened to you that was so bad you wanted to end your life? Don't you know there's so much more in life?"
And my answer is yes. Yes I understand now just how young I am. Just how amazing my life has been, and that really, nothing so bad has happened to me. Yes I know that life has so much to offer, and I cannot begin to express just how thankful I am that I know that now. But this has not always been the case.
When I first returned to my hometown, I was lost. My parents had just split up, I lost my best friends, I was no longer around my cousins Stephanie and JR (who actually kind of tormented me), and I no longer had gymnastics everyday after school. To me, that meant my life sucked.
Fast forward a couple years (okay like 5 years), and I thought I was in love with a boy named D***** and that he was my whole world. We would have children and of course our first son would become D***** the III. So dumb. Anyways, during this time I was starting to have problems with girls that I called my best friends. Throw in the fact that this boy told me I wasn't pretty and that if I was only half as pretty as my best friend ******, then maybe, MAYBE I'd one day get a boyfriend. Hello 13 year old emotions and hormones, nice to screw you up and scar you for a while.
On top of that, I was starting to hate my mother. I don't exactly know why, and that relationship mended during my high school years. I do remember not liking her for some reason. Ultimately she was the reason why I never tried to end everything, just because I knew that there was no way she would be able to pay for a funeral (I had a sick mind).
I never had a suicide attempt. I just thought about it a lot, and I wrote about it a lot in my diaries. I have since burned those diaries because that is something awful to go back and read. I know that part of my life, I don't want to read about it.
And that boy? We're kind of friends now. I say this because I told him about what he said to me and how that made me feel, and he's spent the past 4-5 years apologizing and trying to make up for it. But now he is engaged and I rarely hear from him. This isn't the first time it's happened, but I've learned to just let everything go.
After all, everyone knows that the happy girls are the prettiest girls, and I'm probably the happiest and most content with my life now than I have ever been. Does that mean I think I'm the hottest thing to walk the planet? Definitely not. But I know that on my own, and when people cut me down the way he did, I just write them off. I don't need their negativity.
I unfortunately can answer yes to the first question. I know, some of you may be thinking "Mal, you're only 23! What on earth has happened to you that was so bad you wanted to end your life? Don't you know there's so much more in life?"
And my answer is yes. Yes I understand now just how young I am. Just how amazing my life has been, and that really, nothing so bad has happened to me. Yes I know that life has so much to offer, and I cannot begin to express just how thankful I am that I know that now. But this has not always been the case.
When I first returned to my hometown, I was lost. My parents had just split up, I lost my best friends, I was no longer around my cousins Stephanie and JR (who actually kind of tormented me), and I no longer had gymnastics everyday after school. To me, that meant my life sucked.
Fast forward a couple years (okay like 5 years), and I thought I was in love with a boy named D***** and that he was my whole world. We would have children and of course our first son would become D***** the III. So dumb. Anyways, during this time I was starting to have problems with girls that I called my best friends. Throw in the fact that this boy told me I wasn't pretty and that if I was only half as pretty as my best friend ******, then maybe, MAYBE I'd one day get a boyfriend. Hello 13 year old emotions and hormones, nice to screw you up and scar you for a while.
On top of that, I was starting to hate my mother. I don't exactly know why, and that relationship mended during my high school years. I do remember not liking her for some reason. Ultimately she was the reason why I never tried to end everything, just because I knew that there was no way she would be able to pay for a funeral (I had a sick mind).
I never had a suicide attempt. I just thought about it a lot, and I wrote about it a lot in my diaries. I have since burned those diaries because that is something awful to go back and read. I know that part of my life, I don't want to read about it.
And that boy? We're kind of friends now. I say this because I told him about what he said to me and how that made me feel, and he's spent the past 4-5 years apologizing and trying to make up for it. But now he is engaged and I rarely hear from him. This isn't the first time it's happened, but I've learned to just let everything go.
After all, everyone knows that the happy girls are the prettiest girls, and I'm probably the happiest and most content with my life now than I have ever been. Does that mean I think I'm the hottest thing to walk the planet? Definitely not. But I know that on my own, and when people cut me down the way he did, I just write them off. I don't need their negativity.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 25
Day 25: The reason you believe you're still alive today.
This one has taken me about a week to think about, and I'm still not entirely sure of any of my answers except one.
The first answer is my education. I yearn to learn. No I'm serious. I love learning new things that interest me. Me wanting to get a higher education helped me persevere.
The second is because of this guy:
We dated at a rough time in my life. I was dealing with losing best friends, losing new friends, causing hurt in others, and a lack of confidence in myself. But he was there patiently encouraging me. He didn't have to. In fact, it irritated the crap out of him that I had lost confidence in myself. But he still stood by me when I needed it most.
The last reason is for these six people:
My four cousins and my two brothers. Without them, my world would mean nothing. I love all six of them very deeply and crave the days that I get to spend with them, even if it's doing nothing. They are the reason that I am absolutely positive of that I'm alive today. It also stands true for the rest of my family. Here lately, I haven't been as good of a daughter as I should be, but it's because I've got personal issues that I'm trying to work through in order to change that.
Now that I have made some amazing friends, I am still alive for each of them. They are what gets me up in the mornings. They are what make me laugh and smile throughout the day. They are the ones I cry to. They are the ones I love almost as much as I love my family. And they are the ones that I can never have enough time with.
Those amazing friends should know who they are. If it weren't for my family and friends, I don't know what I would do.
This one has taken me about a week to think about, and I'm still not entirely sure of any of my answers except one.
The first answer is my education. I yearn to learn. No I'm serious. I love learning new things that interest me. Me wanting to get a higher education helped me persevere.
 |
| my soon-to-be alma mater |
The last reason is for these six people:
Now that I have made some amazing friends, I am still alive for each of them. They are what gets me up in the mornings. They are what make me laugh and smile throughout the day. They are the ones I cry to. They are the ones I love almost as much as I love my family. And they are the ones that I can never have enough time with.
Those amazing friends should know who they are. If it weren't for my family and friends, I don't know what I would do.
Monday, February 7, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 24
Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just put song titles and artists and a letter.)
Today's truth comes along with a little anonymity. If you are my friend, you KNOW I love making mixed CDs, and that I put a lot of time and effort and thinking into each of the songs I add to the playlist. Also, because I enjoy making playlists, today's playlist isn't toward any of you that I call my closest friends (I couldn't pick just one of you!). I will explain after the songs why I made it for this person.
The playlist:
The letter:
Today's truth comes along with a little anonymity. If you are my friend, you KNOW I love making mixed CDs, and that I put a lot of time and effort and thinking into each of the songs I add to the playlist. Also, because I enjoy making playlists, today's playlist isn't toward any of you that I call my closest friends (I couldn't pick just one of you!). I will explain after the songs why I made it for this person.
The playlist:
- You Make me Smile - Uncle Kracker
- Beautiful - Akon
- Sexy Can I - Ray J
- Just a Friend - Mario
- Fallin' for You - Colbie Caillat
- My Paper Heart - All American Rejects
- In my Head - Jason Derulo
- Beautiful Disaster - Kelly Clarkson
- Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop - Landon Pigg
- Disappear - Hoobastank
- Here in Your Arms - Hellogoodbye (this has significance with "I like / where we are / when we drive / in your car")
- Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
- Just the Way You Are - Bruno Mars
- Anything but Mine - Kenny Chesney
- You Belong with Me - Taylor Swift
- Your Love is my Drug - Ke$ha
and finally, what is a mixed CD/playlist that doesn't include my favorite: - I Believe in a Thing Called Love - The Darkness
The letter:
Dear JJ,
You will find a list of songs above that say a lot of the words that I haven't been able to. We have had classes together for about 2 years now, and I have always thought you were super nice. But something happened last semester. You were more kind in ways than I could have ever imagined, and you let me cry to you (without making fun of me) when I told you about that incident (that I mentioned in Day 04). Unfortunately, I will never give you this playlist, or tell you that I am in love with your smile, your bantering back and forth with me, or that I think you're a beautifully amazing person because of one tiny little fact: You have a girlfriend that you care about deeply. PLUS, I don't want to make our friendship awkward because even though I want something more right now, I truly cherish the relationship that has grown between us just in the past 5 months or so.
I can't wait to work on our group project together this semester, and can't wait to walk across that platform stage with you in May. I hope you bring someone else as much friendship love as you've brought me, and I hope we stay in touch once we no longer have classes together. I know that once you get into PT school, you'll make a good Physical Therapist because you've been there.
Stay strong, stay positive, and always smile :)
-Mal
Sunday, February 6, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 23
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
Seeing as how I am only 23 years young, I think it's pretty safe to say that I have mostly lived a life with no regrets. Because of today's topic, I want to do this again in 5-10 years or so, and see how my answers differ from today.
If I had to pick one thing that I probably should have done, it's simple, really:
I wish I had followed through with being recruited, and played basketball at Westminster College.
Upon looking at this site to find the links to the separate pages, I realized that the coach who recruited me isn't even on staff anymore, and hasn't been since what would have been my second year on the team. That means that I probably would have left when he did, because I really liked him a lot.
I don't really regret not going. I have made a home here in Norman, and I love how large the University is, even though I didn't love it at first. I just wish that I would have turned down the opportunity to play for the right reasons. I was listening with my head and not my heart at that point, and unfortunately made the decision not to go for other people.
I know now that if I had chosen that path over this one, I would have been awfully homesick. He guaranteed me that I most likely would not get to return home for Christmas. That's just not acceptable.
Plus, without me being here, I don't know that I would have made the amazing friends that I've made!
Seeing as how I am only 23 years young, I think it's pretty safe to say that I have mostly lived a life with no regrets. Because of today's topic, I want to do this again in 5-10 years or so, and see how my answers differ from today.
If I had to pick one thing that I probably should have done, it's simple, really:
I wish I had followed through with being recruited, and played basketball at Westminster College.
Upon looking at this site to find the links to the separate pages, I realized that the coach who recruited me isn't even on staff anymore, and hasn't been since what would have been my second year on the team. That means that I probably would have left when he did, because I really liked him a lot.
I don't really regret not going. I have made a home here in Norman, and I love how large the University is, even though I didn't love it at first. I just wish that I would have turned down the opportunity to play for the right reasons. I was listening with my head and not my heart at that point, and unfortunately made the decision not to go for other people.
I know now that if I had chosen that path over this one, I would have been awfully homesick. He guaranteed me that I most likely would not get to return home for Christmas. That's just not acceptable.
Plus, without me being here, I don't know that I would have made the amazing friends that I've made!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 22
Day 22: Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.
Here's a small little story about the VERY BIG thing I did that I wish I had never picked up.
I don't really know where or how it began, I just remember that it was a habit during my sophomore year in college...I honestly think it started when I started dating a guy who worked his ass off to get my number.
Anyways, I'm not proud to admit, but at one point I started smoking. It was an awful addiction.
Then I started hanging out with people who smoked. And when I would go to bars and stuff, I made cool new friends just from being outside and smoking and introducing ourselves to each other, because so many people would shun us for being smokers.
Then one of my best friends in the sorority house started smoking, so I had a smoking buddy. There was one godawful night that we went through about a pack and a half together (heavy drinking was involved). I'm pretty sure we got nicotine poisoning from that night.
Then I started dating a different guy who was also a smoker. And he chain smoked. Every time he would light one, he'd ask if I wanted to smoke. I smoked just about one for every three of his cigarettes.
Once I decided I wanted to run consistently, I quit. Just said, "Okay, once I've had these last three, I have to give it up for good." Cold Turkey. It wasn't that bad for me, but the social pressure came in a couple times for the remainder of that semester, and I tried to smoke a couple times at parties but it gagged me. My lungs were reminding me (painfully) that I was serious about running and quitting smoking.
I can be around smokers, but the minute I try to take one puff, I choke and gag. But I haven't looked back since, and I wish I had never become an addict. The quitting part was a big step for my health, saved me a lot of money (I smoked cloves, and they ran about $7/pack), and I'm glad I quit.
Here's a small little story about the VERY BIG thing I did that I wish I had never picked up.
I don't really know where or how it began, I just remember that it was a habit during my sophomore year in college...I honestly think it started when I started dating a guy who worked his ass off to get my number.
Anyways, I'm not proud to admit, but at one point I started smoking. It was an awful addiction.
Then I started hanging out with people who smoked. And when I would go to bars and stuff, I made cool new friends just from being outside and smoking and introducing ourselves to each other, because so many people would shun us for being smokers.
Then one of my best friends in the sorority house started smoking, so I had a smoking buddy. There was one godawful night that we went through about a pack and a half together (heavy drinking was involved). I'm pretty sure we got nicotine poisoning from that night.
Then I started dating a different guy who was also a smoker. And he chain smoked. Every time he would light one, he'd ask if I wanted to smoke. I smoked just about one for every three of his cigarettes.
Once I decided I wanted to run consistently, I quit. Just said, "Okay, once I've had these last three, I have to give it up for good." Cold Turkey. It wasn't that bad for me, but the social pressure came in a couple times for the remainder of that semester, and I tried to smoke a couple times at parties but it gagged me. My lungs were reminding me (painfully) that I was serious about running and quitting smoking.
I can be around smokers, but the minute I try to take one puff, I choke and gag. But I haven't looked back since, and I wish I had never become an addict. The quitting part was a big step for my health, saved me a lot of money (I smoked cloves, and they ran about $7/pack), and I'm glad I quit.
Friday, February 4, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 21
Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
There is no fight in this world big enough to stop me from rushing (safely) to the hospital in this instance. I don't care what it is he or she said that hurt me enough to consider a big fight, in the end they are my best friend. And, it's typically times like these that make you realize just how much that person means to you.
I would probably find someone to drive me, because I tend to get hysterical when a freak accident happens.
Sorry today's truth wasn't very long or interesting, but that's all I've got for today's.
There is no fight in this world big enough to stop me from rushing (safely) to the hospital in this instance. I don't care what it is he or she said that hurt me enough to consider a big fight, in the end they are my best friend. And, it's typically times like these that make you realize just how much that person means to you.
I would probably find someone to drive me, because I tend to get hysterical when a freak accident happens.
Sorry today's truth wasn't very long or interesting, but that's all I've got for today's.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 20
Day 20: Your view on drugs and alcohol.
Today's truth may be a little lengthy, so please bear with me.
My thought on drugs is that for the most part, they should be illegal. I really wish our nation would legalize marijuana, not because I am a user myself but because I feel that there are so many things that could benefit from legalization. We would be able to empty out some prison cells that contain inmates whose only crime is the production of marijuana. It would leave these cells open for people who have committed other crimes like murder and rape. I also think that if it were legalized, then there would be a way to regulate it and tax the crap out of it. I also believe that if it were legalized, the stigma of "doing something bad" might lessen, and maybe less people would be doing it. I also feel like it would cut down on crime against the people selling it from their drug lord.
The things that I understand about marijuana make it hard to understand why it is illegal but cigarettes are not. Cigarettes have so many additives and chemicals, and they alter brain function. They have chemicals in them to make them addictive. I was told that marijuana does not, and that it is a pretty natural thing (I'm not exactly sure of this).
As far as other drugs go, I believe they should stay illegal. They alter brain function and can cause people to do things they wouldn't normally do. But this is where it gets touchy, because if marijuana were legalized, I'm afraid more people would try other drugs that are a little more harsh on the body, like heroin, meth, and cocaine.
If I were to completely go along with the "alters brain function" thing, then I would have to say that alcohol should be illegal too. But that is not my view.
I enjoy a glass of wine with dinner, a nice cold beer in the summer, and a mixed drink or two when I'm going out with friends. I feel that when it is consumed responsibly, alcohol can add just the right flavor to any dish without causing harm to the consumer. And red wine has fantastic health benefits (when drank correctly).
But the issue with the abuse of alcohol is what I have a problem with. Too many families are torn apart by drinking and drunk drivers. I am all for alcohol, but I'm all for drinking alcohol responsibly. If you have the money to spend at a bar, put some aside and get a cab ride home if you've had more than one drink. Rotate who is being a Desginated Driver every time you go out. Don't leave without everyone. If you are DD, make sure your friends aren't consuming too much. It's not that hard to be safe about the consumption of alcohol.
I also believe that if you are 18 and go straight into the military service, then you should be able to consume as well. If you can fight for our country, why can't you drink too? But I don't believe this should be extended to everyone who is 18. When I was underage, I wanted it to be 18. But now that I have had a couple years of being able to drink legally, I see the importance in the delay in legal age.I don't think a majority of 18 year olds are mature enough to deal with the implications of drinking.
But once you are of age, please enjoy the tastes as much as I do!
Today's truth may be a little lengthy, so please bear with me.
My thought on drugs is that for the most part, they should be illegal. I really wish our nation would legalize marijuana, not because I am a user myself but because I feel that there are so many things that could benefit from legalization. We would be able to empty out some prison cells that contain inmates whose only crime is the production of marijuana. It would leave these cells open for people who have committed other crimes like murder and rape. I also think that if it were legalized, then there would be a way to regulate it and tax the crap out of it. I also believe that if it were legalized, the stigma of "doing something bad" might lessen, and maybe less people would be doing it. I also feel like it would cut down on crime against the people selling it from their drug lord.
The things that I understand about marijuana make it hard to understand why it is illegal but cigarettes are not. Cigarettes have so many additives and chemicals, and they alter brain function. They have chemicals in them to make them addictive. I was told that marijuana does not, and that it is a pretty natural thing (I'm not exactly sure of this).
As far as other drugs go, I believe they should stay illegal. They alter brain function and can cause people to do things they wouldn't normally do. But this is where it gets touchy, because if marijuana were legalized, I'm afraid more people would try other drugs that are a little more harsh on the body, like heroin, meth, and cocaine.
If I were to completely go along with the "alters brain function" thing, then I would have to say that alcohol should be illegal too. But that is not my view.
I enjoy a glass of wine with dinner, a nice cold beer in the summer, and a mixed drink or two when I'm going out with friends. I feel that when it is consumed responsibly, alcohol can add just the right flavor to any dish without causing harm to the consumer. And red wine has fantastic health benefits (when drank correctly).
But the issue with the abuse of alcohol is what I have a problem with. Too many families are torn apart by drinking and drunk drivers. I am all for alcohol, but I'm all for drinking alcohol responsibly. If you have the money to spend at a bar, put some aside and get a cab ride home if you've had more than one drink. Rotate who is being a Desginated Driver every time you go out. Don't leave without everyone. If you are DD, make sure your friends aren't consuming too much. It's not that hard to be safe about the consumption of alcohol.
I also believe that if you are 18 and go straight into the military service, then you should be able to consume as well. If you can fight for our country, why can't you drink too? But I don't believe this should be extended to everyone who is 18. When I was underage, I wanted it to be 18. But now that I have had a couple years of being able to drink legally, I see the importance in the delay in legal age.I don't think a majority of 18 year olds are mature enough to deal with the implications of drinking.
But once you are of age, please enjoy the tastes as much as I do!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 19
I'm going to go with religion on today's truth. I just don't feel that I am active enough in politics to give an honest and educated answer.
I think that religion is a good starting place to figure out what it is about your spirituality that is important for you. All my life, I have been raised a Southern Baptist in the heart of the Bible belt, and have attended church since I was out of the hospital.
Like almost every person growing up with, it was expected of me to attend any and all church services and functions. Then when I turned 16, I got a boyfriend and started skipping out on services. I didn't get into trouble, and it was at this point that my family said I was "old enough to make my own decisions." It was a shock.
I think that each religion offers its own good things and bad things (at least the ones I've been in contact with.) I don't think I personally have a right to say who is wrong and who is right. I firmly believe that religion and spirituality are two separate entities, and my conviction on this is even stronger now that I have taken a course that required a term paper over what we believed to be our spirituality.
I guess in all, I'm pretty accepting of any and all religions. I do not believe that some of them are teaching correct things, but who knows if my "religion" is correct? I guess when Judgement Day comes (another event taught within my religion), I will have to answer for my wrongdoings, and maybe even for my tolerance. But that is between me and the God that I believe in.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 18
Day 18: Your Views on Gay Marriage
This is where I might get some grief from those closest to me.
My views are liberally conservative typically, but this is where the liberal comes out a little bit more.
The Bible does say that homosexuality is a sin. It says it in the Old Testament, so according to my religious beliefs it's wrong.
But my personal beliefs says that we shouldn't judge people. I feel like the only person who is allowed to judge others is God. I'm not saying that I am guilt-less when it comes to judging others, but in the end I will have to answer for my own sins.
If two people are happy and want to have a piece of paper that says they are legally bound to each other, why does it matter if they are gay or straight? And if we're going to start saying who can and cannot be married, why can't we do it with straight couples? So many marriages in today's world end in divorce. straight marriages end in divorce. From the few homosexual people I know, they put more thought into what it is he or she is looking for in a mate. I feel like if we would just let homosexual people get married, maybe straight couples would be able to ask them for advice for happy marriages.
I'm not saying all straight couples hate each other and all homosexuals shit sunshine and rainbows. I'm just asking for some equality, hell, it was given to women and people of color.
This is where I might get some grief from those closest to me.
My views are liberally conservative typically, but this is where the liberal comes out a little bit more.
The Bible does say that homosexuality is a sin. It says it in the Old Testament, so according to my religious beliefs it's wrong.
But my personal beliefs says that we shouldn't judge people. I feel like the only person who is allowed to judge others is God. I'm not saying that I am guilt-less when it comes to judging others, but in the end I will have to answer for my own sins.
If two people are happy and want to have a piece of paper that says they are legally bound to each other, why does it matter if they are gay or straight? And if we're going to start saying who can and cannot be married, why can't we do it with straight couples? So many marriages in today's world end in divorce. straight marriages end in divorce. From the few homosexual people I know, they put more thought into what it is he or she is looking for in a mate. I feel like if we would just let homosexual people get married, maybe straight couples would be able to ask them for advice for happy marriages.
I'm not saying all straight couples hate each other and all homosexuals shit sunshine and rainbows. I'm just asking for some equality, hell, it was given to women and people of color.
Monday, January 31, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 17
Day 17: A book you've read that changed your views on something.
I wish that this "view" that was changed was something profound like my political or religious views, but in all actuality, the book that changed my views the most was during my senior year when I read Tuesdays with Morrie.
I absolutely loved this book. As I read it, I didn't fully understand the way it would change my views, but now that I have been out of school for five years (eesh), I realize that it has changed my view on how much we should value the elderly generations.
I'm not saying that I treat them like crap, I just think that more people my age should take the time to sit down and speak with them. Speak with them about everything! From the travelling they did, the things they did for fun, their favorite part of being in their 20s, ANYTHING. This is one thing I wish I had done while my great-grandpa Jesse was alive and coherent, but I don't even know if I was old enough to ask him questions like this before he went senile.
If you haven't read Tuesdays with Morrie, I suggest you try to read it as soon as possible. I really need to read it again because it has been too long since I've read it. The book even made me cry (back before I was as big of a sap as I am now)!
I wish that this "view" that was changed was something profound like my political or religious views, but in all actuality, the book that changed my views the most was during my senior year when I read Tuesdays with Morrie.
I absolutely loved this book. As I read it, I didn't fully understand the way it would change my views, but now that I have been out of school for five years (eesh), I realize that it has changed my view on how much we should value the elderly generations.
I'm not saying that I treat them like crap, I just think that more people my age should take the time to sit down and speak with them. Speak with them about everything! From the travelling they did, the things they did for fun, their favorite part of being in their 20s, ANYTHING. This is one thing I wish I had done while my great-grandpa Jesse was alive and coherent, but I don't even know if I was old enough to ask him questions like this before he went senile.
If you haven't read Tuesdays with Morrie, I suggest you try to read it as soon as possible. I really need to read it again because it has been too long since I've read it. The book even made me cry (back before I was as big of a sap as I am now)!
Sunday, January 30, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 16
Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without
This one has two possibilities, so I think I want to write about both. The first one won't take long, so I promise you won't be bored!
Negativity. No one needs this. It only brings me down. When I am around people that are constantly negative, I do a lot of self-talk to remember that they only say things like this because that is how they are, and that I cannot let it affect me. "Come on Mal, you know you are a happy person. Remember, things could ALWAYS be worse. Think of how much you love (insert name here) and how much (he/she) means to you. That is something to be happy about."
Jealousy. I hate being human and feeling this terrible emotion. I try not to, and still self-talk me out of the emotion, but sometimes it just takes over and I have to completely distance myself from the situation so that I don't say something I regret. This ugly green monster comes up in a variety of ways:
This one has two possibilities, so I think I want to write about both. The first one won't take long, so I promise you won't be bored!
Negativity. No one needs this. It only brings me down. When I am around people that are constantly negative, I do a lot of self-talk to remember that they only say things like this because that is how they are, and that I cannot let it affect me. "Come on Mal, you know you are a happy person. Remember, things could ALWAYS be worse. Think of how much you love (insert name here) and how much (he/she) means to you. That is something to be happy about."
Jealousy. I hate being human and feeling this terrible emotion. I try not to, and still self-talk me out of the emotion, but sometimes it just takes over and I have to completely distance myself from the situation so that I don't say something I regret. This ugly green monster comes up in a variety of ways:
- friends who have money, and don't understand what it's like to struggle financially
- how pretty some people are
- how no matter what some people do, they seem to have everything together
- how talented people are
- how loved some people seem
it's ugly, and I hate it, but I'm human. And I'm sure if you are one of my friends, I've most likely felt jealous of you before too. Please don't think any less of me because of it. It doesn't make me love you any less, and I really wish I didn't feel that way about you.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 15
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn't live without, because you tried living without it.
This one is probably one of the most difficult to be completely honest about. There are many "someones," and I don't know that I could write about just one someone.
My thought process on something that I tried living without has taken much time. I think that is probably why I stopped on this day. But THANKFULLY, I have come to the conclusion that the thing I can't live without (because I have tried) is two very related things:
RUNNING AND PLAYING SPORTS.
I know, completely ridiculous. When I was being recruited in high school, I thought I would be done playing sports, I thought I was going to be glad to be rid of the long practices followed by losing games. I have never been more wrong in my life.
I immediately begin to play intramurals once I went to college, and I have even found myself playing in leagues during the summer for volleyball. I didn't even play volleyball in high school.
Then my family and I play various sports on the holidays. Typically, we play football on Thanksgiving and kickball on the fourth of July. The sports are some of the things that I love most about the holidays :)
And then, then, I don't know what caused me to decide that I wanted to pick up running. It was always the punishment for both softball and basketball in high school, but one day I decided I would give it a try as a sport itself.
I ran a couple 5Ks at school. I liked the challenge of the race, but didn't really care if I finished first or last. Just wanted to finish. Then my friend Sam at Love Never Fails finished a FULL marathon just about 4 years after an accident that broke her pelvis and resulted in the doctors telling her that she would be lucky if she ever ran again. If someone who had the possibility of not running again could finish a full, why couldn't I take on the challenge of distance running? So I challenged myself. In March of 2010, I ran my first 10K through my major's club at school. I was exhilarated at my finish/finish time. I didn't think I could do it. Naturally, my next challenge was to become a finisher of a half marathon.
On November 21, 2010, I completed that goal. Training never went as well as I had hoped it would, but I finished. I finished. I finished. I didn't necessarily have the best time in the world, but I finished. During the race, I wanted to give up. I wanted to let my calves cramp and have them take me off. I wanted to shoot myself in the foot for registering for the race. But then I would think of what finishing meant to me, and think about everyone that was my inspiration for doing it, and I pushed on.
(Inspiration: of course Sam, Mimi, my 4 cousins, my brothers, my mom, my big)
I want to run more. It's kind of an addicting task, to complete a half marathon. I know it's weird, but I will most likely never run a full. My field of study in school is Health and Exercise Sciences, and many, many times we have gone over how the human body is not made to complete that many miles in one sitting. I know, I know that so many people have done that (and so much more), but I feel like that with my knowledge of the HUGE risks that come along with running 26.2 miles at once, I don't think I could go against my learning.
So, thank you for learning what it is I can't live without. I've tried to keep playing and running out of my life, but it won't go away! I guess it's a good thing though, running and playing sports are what keeps me healthy. :)
This one is probably one of the most difficult to be completely honest about. There are many "someones," and I don't know that I could write about just one someone.
My thought process on something that I tried living without has taken much time. I think that is probably why I stopped on this day. But THANKFULLY, I have come to the conclusion that the thing I can't live without (because I have tried) is two very related things:
RUNNING AND PLAYING SPORTS.
I know, completely ridiculous. When I was being recruited in high school, I thought I would be done playing sports, I thought I was going to be glad to be rid of the long practices followed by losing games. I have never been more wrong in my life.
I immediately begin to play intramurals once I went to college, and I have even found myself playing in leagues during the summer for volleyball. I didn't even play volleyball in high school.
Then my family and I play various sports on the holidays. Typically, we play football on Thanksgiving and kickball on the fourth of July. The sports are some of the things that I love most about the holidays :)
And then, then, I don't know what caused me to decide that I wanted to pick up running. It was always the punishment for both softball and basketball in high school, but one day I decided I would give it a try as a sport itself.
I ran a couple 5Ks at school. I liked the challenge of the race, but didn't really care if I finished first or last. Just wanted to finish. Then my friend Sam at Love Never Fails finished a FULL marathon just about 4 years after an accident that broke her pelvis and resulted in the doctors telling her that she would be lucky if she ever ran again. If someone who had the possibility of not running again could finish a full, why couldn't I take on the challenge of distance running? So I challenged myself. In March of 2010, I ran my first 10K through my major's club at school. I was exhilarated at my finish/finish time. I didn't think I could do it. Naturally, my next challenge was to become a finisher of a half marathon.
On November 21, 2010, I completed that goal. Training never went as well as I had hoped it would, but I finished. I finished. I finished. I didn't necessarily have the best time in the world, but I finished. During the race, I wanted to give up. I wanted to let my calves cramp and have them take me off. I wanted to shoot myself in the foot for registering for the race. But then I would think of what finishing meant to me, and think about everyone that was my inspiration for doing it, and I pushed on.
(Inspiration: of course Sam, Mimi, my 4 cousins, my brothers, my mom, my big)
I want to run more. It's kind of an addicting task, to complete a half marathon. I know it's weird, but I will most likely never run a full. My field of study in school is Health and Exercise Sciences, and many, many times we have gone over how the human body is not made to complete that many miles in one sitting. I know, I know that so many people have done that (and so much more), but I feel like that with my knowledge of the HUGE risks that come along with running 26.2 miles at once, I don't think I could go against my learning.
So, thank you for learning what it is I can't live without. I've tried to keep playing and running out of my life, but it won't go away! I guess it's a good thing though, running and playing sports are what keeps me healthy. :)
Friday, January 28, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 14
Day 14: A Hero That Has Let You Down. (Letter)
This one is kind of difficult. One, I don't have many "heroes." Two, those heroes I do have our people I actually know. So the recipient of this letter is going to remain anonymous, just because I do not want that person to stumble across this and be upset about me putting all the things between us out on the kitchen table.
Dear Person Whom I Love,
I don't know what has gone wrong with our relationship in the past 5 years. In all the time I knew you while growing up, you were completely supportive of me, rejoiced with me in my accomplishments, and shared my happiness as well as my sorrows. But somewhere along the way, things changed. It seems as if you began to stop caring as much about me, and became more and more selfish.
I'm not trying to put all the blame on you. I do know that at one point I began pushing you away. Part of that was because you weren't there for me at one of my hardest moments in my life, a moment when I needed you the most. I just wanted you to ask me about the guy who was my boyfriend at the time, ask me what was wrong, but instead you were too wrapped up in your significant other to even realize I was broken.
I went through a lot of shit after him. I wasn't the same person anymore, and I began to hate you. I didn't like that I hated you, so I sought counseling. It didn't help that much when I first began because I was in denial. Then when I started opening up more and more to DeAnn, it began helping. I begin to substitute her for you. Do you know how awful that felt, knowing that I confided more in a complete stranger rather than you? It wasn't supposed to be that way.
I've always admired you and your character, and the love you've shown to those closest to you, but this was awful. I had never been so disappointed in my life.
Right now, we're trying to work through things, but circumstances are not making it easy. It's almost to the point that I wonder if you are willing to work everything out or not. Either way, let me know. I'm always here.
Mallori
This one is kind of difficult. One, I don't have many "heroes." Two, those heroes I do have our people I actually know. So the recipient of this letter is going to remain anonymous, just because I do not want that person to stumble across this and be upset about me putting all the things between us out on the kitchen table.
Dear Person Whom I Love,
I don't know what has gone wrong with our relationship in the past 5 years. In all the time I knew you while growing up, you were completely supportive of me, rejoiced with me in my accomplishments, and shared my happiness as well as my sorrows. But somewhere along the way, things changed. It seems as if you began to stop caring as much about me, and became more and more selfish.
I'm not trying to put all the blame on you. I do know that at one point I began pushing you away. Part of that was because you weren't there for me at one of my hardest moments in my life, a moment when I needed you the most. I just wanted you to ask me about the guy who was my boyfriend at the time, ask me what was wrong, but instead you were too wrapped up in your significant other to even realize I was broken.
I went through a lot of shit after him. I wasn't the same person anymore, and I began to hate you. I didn't like that I hated you, so I sought counseling. It didn't help that much when I first began because I was in denial. Then when I started opening up more and more to DeAnn, it began helping. I begin to substitute her for you. Do you know how awful that felt, knowing that I confided more in a complete stranger rather than you? It wasn't supposed to be that way.
I've always admired you and your character, and the love you've shown to those closest to you, but this was awful. I had never been so disappointed in my life.
Right now, we're trying to work through things, but circumstances are not making it easy. It's almost to the point that I wonder if you are willing to work everything out or not. Either way, let me know. I'm always here.
Mallori
Thursday, January 27, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 13
Day 13: A Band or Artist that has Gotten You Through Some Tough Ass Days (Write a Letter.)
Dear Kelly Clarkson,
I fell in love with your music when you won American Idol. Even though I never watched your season (or really, any season since), your voice was one of my favorite new sounds back in 2002. I truly believe there is a reason you were the first American Idol. I loved that the girl who won wasn't a cookie-cutter of the current pop stars. You demanded attention on stage, and I loved that I could relate to your lyrics.
I bought your first album, but I must confess that I only listened to the songs I knew (shame on me). But then, in 2004, you released Breakaway. I was hooked. The songs on this album seemed to be a little deeper, and I couldn't help but sing my heart out to "Since U Been Gone." Breakaway helped me through my senior year when I was giving up on the hope of having friends, saw me through the nervousness of attending college, and then the heartbreak of trying to distance myself from my very beloved high school sweetheart. I wish I knew what it was about your lyrics and voice that made me fall in love with your music, but I seriously love ALL of it.
And, I kind of adopted "Beautiful Disaster" (from Breakaway) as my theme song (only changing a little bit of it to say that I am a beautiful disaster).
But no, you weren't done yet. With My December came girl anger, and a calming song that I still am obsessed with to this day, "Sober." Here is where you let your soul show through your music and reminded me that everything is going to be okay. I'm very sad to tell you that this is the only CD of yours that I do not own, but I have heard all the tracks and love it just as much, if not more than your first two.
So when you came out with All I Ever Wanted in 2009, there was no question as to if I was buying it. And can I just say, I think this one may be the one that impresses me most. You have such variety in all of your songs throughout the entire album! I loved singing and dancing to the first two singles you released :) They were the perfect pop songs I was looking for. But then you slow it down with "Already Gone," and I felt like you took the words right out of myself.
But my favorite? You showing that pop girls can rap with "Whyyawannabringmedown." OB-freaking-SESSED. I find myself jamming to it all the time.
Please continue to make music that I love and speaks to me. Without some of your lyrics, I would have never gotten out of bed on some days. Some of your lyrics remind me that "it's gonna be alright."
Sincerely,
Mallori, forever in your debt for the songs you produce.
Dear Kelly Clarkson,
I fell in love with your music when you won American Idol. Even though I never watched your season (or really, any season since), your voice was one of my favorite new sounds back in 2002. I truly believe there is a reason you were the first American Idol. I loved that the girl who won wasn't a cookie-cutter of the current pop stars. You demanded attention on stage, and I loved that I could relate to your lyrics.
I bought your first album, but I must confess that I only listened to the songs I knew (shame on me). But then, in 2004, you released Breakaway. I was hooked. The songs on this album seemed to be a little deeper, and I couldn't help but sing my heart out to "Since U Been Gone." Breakaway helped me through my senior year when I was giving up on the hope of having friends, saw me through the nervousness of attending college, and then the heartbreak of trying to distance myself from my very beloved high school sweetheart. I wish I knew what it was about your lyrics and voice that made me fall in love with your music, but I seriously love ALL of it.
And, I kind of adopted "Beautiful Disaster" (from Breakaway) as my theme song (only changing a little bit of it to say that I am a beautiful disaster).
But no, you weren't done yet. With My December came girl anger, and a calming song that I still am obsessed with to this day, "Sober." Here is where you let your soul show through your music and reminded me that everything is going to be okay. I'm very sad to tell you that this is the only CD of yours that I do not own, but I have heard all the tracks and love it just as much, if not more than your first two.
So when you came out with All I Ever Wanted in 2009, there was no question as to if I was buying it. And can I just say, I think this one may be the one that impresses me most. You have such variety in all of your songs throughout the entire album! I loved singing and dancing to the first two singles you released :) They were the perfect pop songs I was looking for. But then you slow it down with "Already Gone," and I felt like you took the words right out of myself.
But my favorite? You showing that pop girls can rap with "Whyyawannabringmedown." OB-freaking-SESSED. I find myself jamming to it all the time.
Please continue to make music that I love and speaks to me. Without some of your lyrics, I would have never gotten out of bed on some days. Some of your lyrics remind me that "it's gonna be alright."
Sincerely,
Mallori, forever in your debt for the songs you produce.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 12
Day 12: Something You Never Get Compliments on.
Like Day 11's Truth, I had to get help for this one too. I'm not big on fishing for compliments, but I do appreciate the ones I get. There are probably other things that I never get compliments on, but this particular thing is something I love about myself.
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| Courtesy of Google Images |
Like I said in Day 02's Truth, I love how tall I am. Although, I'm not sure you can really compliment someone on how tall he or she is . . . In fact, now that I think about it, I may get compliments on this, but usually when someone mentions my height, it makes me feel like a giantess.
So maybe it gets mentioned, but I don't know that they are necessarily compliments.
I can't wait for tomorrow's truth so I can stop talking about my compliments and stuff.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
30 Days of Truth: Day 11
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
I honestly had to get some help with this truth and tomorrow's truth. I feel like I don't receive compliments, at least not to my face, too often. I definitely had to ask what people think of me.
The consensus? People compliment me on my hair all the time. They say it's pretty, soft, shiny, always looks good. I never really realized this, until I was getting ready the other day and I had 2 sisters come in and out of the bathroom, and the both said "Mal, your hair is so pretty." So I'll let you be the judge.
Here are some pictures of me with LONG hair:
And here are some pictures of me with SHORT hair:
I guess I can see what people mean. After all, I did say in Day 02's Truth that I do love my hair. . .
I honestly had to get some help with this truth and tomorrow's truth. I feel like I don't receive compliments, at least not to my face, too often. I definitely had to ask what people think of me.
The consensus? People compliment me on my hair all the time. They say it's pretty, soft, shiny, always looks good. I never really realized this, until I was getting ready the other day and I had 2 sisters come in and out of the bathroom, and the both said "Mal, your hair is so pretty." So I'll let you be the judge.
Here are some pictures of me with LONG hair:
And here are some pictures of me with SHORT hair:
I guess I can see what people mean. After all, I did say in Day 02's Truth that I do love my hair. . .
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