If I were completely honest, I would let you know that I haven't been very happy lately. You see, I was in a situation that I thought I couldn't get out of. I won't go into too many details because a lot of it is very personal in a place where it should not be personal at all. And then I got away from the situation, and thought everything would be smooth sailing from there. And it was. It was great for about two weeks. Then I got some news that I was about to be put right back into that same situation.
On top of that, I got some more disheartening news at the end of last week. So I was broken. I cried for hours, woke up with puffy eyes, went to work still miserable from the night before, did it again, and then tried to busy myself to take my mind off of it.
Then Monday night, I finally got to talk to someone that wasn't anywhere near the situation or involved with anyone in it (but me), and he talked some sense into me. So after a fantastic late night conversation followed by a day off to do nothing but lay around all day, I finally feel better. I know the situation is going to be just as toxic as before, and that eventually the truth will come out, but all I know is that I have to try my damndest to not let it get to me this time. I wish I could say that I know it won't, but I also know how things will be eventually. You can't really change people's personalities.
So today, I woke up with a renewed sense of self, straightened my hair, put on makeup, and wore something bright and colorful. So right now, I have two more weeks before I get thrown into bull shit again, and then I just have to take it one day at a time.
I'll ask you all like I did one of my closest friends...For now, I'm okay. I'm just having a little bit of a hard time trusting people right now because I feel a little betrayed. But can you bear with me for just a little bit longer? I promise the real me will be back. I just need a little time.