Monday, January 24, 2011

30 Days of Truth: Day 10

Day 10: Someone You Need to Let Go, or Wish You Didn't Know.

Today's is pretty easy for me too. I'm taking the part that's "Someone You Wish You Didn't Know." It starts as a love (well, very much in like) story.

It all began during the 2007-2008 Christmas break. I was at the house of a guy I graduated with, and a bunch of people that graduated with us were there too. We were having a party, celebrating everyone being on break and back in town. I was just kind of minding my own business, hanging out with my old friends, taking lots of drunken pictures, and enjoying the night (I think it was New Year's Eve, but I'm not 100% entirely sure.)

A guy came up to me and introduced himself. I knew who he was because he was there with a girl that graduated the year before I did. I thought he was cute, but I SO was not going there. I wasn't all that good of friends with the girl whom he was dating. I didn't want to be rude, so I made very small talk, then excused myself to go out to the garage. I was out in the garage for maybe 5 minutes, and then he was out there. I then excused myself to go inside, and as you can imagine this went on for a little bit. Then the party started going way too late into the night, and some newcomers picked a fight with one of the guys I went to school with. The party was definitely over.

A couple weeks later, this boy added me on myspace. I reluctantly accepted his friend request, but made nothing of it. Then the messages started coming. They were sporadic, and I would purposely wait a few days to respond. It really annoyed me that he was telling me I was pretty and he really wanted to get to know me better the night we met when he was still dating the girl.

I turned 21 in November of 2008, and he sent me a message on the morning of my birthday asking if I was in town and if he could buy me a birthday drink. (My birthday was on Thanksgiving day.) I declined and told him that I appreciated the offer but I didn't know him well enough and I didn't think his girlfriend would be too happy with him buying me a drink. He responded by saying they had broken up in September and he had wanted to tell me but didn't want me to be weirded out. I stopped messaging.

Christmas break came, he started messaging me almost every day. He kept saying he wanted to meet up with me, wanted to take me on a date, all this crap. About a week before I was to head back to school, I finally decided that I might kinda like him, so we exchanged numbers. My last Saturday night in Tulsa, he asked me to meet him at a bar. I did, and we had a good time talking and dancing. He kissed me good night when I left, and opened my car door for me. hook, line, and sinker. Sunday afternoon, he asked to take me to a movie. I agreed whole-heartedly this time. He then kissed me again. Well hello there loving emotions, nice to see you back. I was supposed to leave semi-early on the Monday morning, but my mom wanted me to come eat lunch with her before I left. When he realized I hadn't left yet, he asked me to come pick him up from work and take him home so he could see me for a little bit. Of course I did.

The next couple of months were fantastic. We were seeing each other every weekend (with the exception of Valentine's Day weekend, it was just too weird for me). He was taking me on dates every weekend, all weekend long. He came to Norman for one of my date parties. He met my friends. I liked the boy a lot.

There were a couple drunken nights where he let slip those three nasty little words that I believe get thrown around too much, and it freaked me out a little bit. But for the most part, I liked him, he liked me, and I liked spending time with him.

When spring break came around, I was excited about getting to see him 10 days in a row, instead of our usual 3. We made plans to go out on St. Patrick's Day because it was my first time to be legal for the holiday. We hung out Friday night, made plans for Saturday, and when I texted him Saturday, I never got a response. He finally talked to me on St. Patty's day and told me he made plans with his roommate and he didn't mind if I went and hung out with my guy friends. This NEVER happened before, he always questioned my intentions when a guy would text me while we were together. lame. Basically that was the last time I heard from him until the Sunday after my first week back after spring break. He called me from what I thought was his ex-girlfriend's phone, and answered with this "Hey Mal, ***** wanted me to call you and make sure you knew it was over between you and me." Seriously? douche. I was done the minute you started ignoring me, no matter how much I liked you.

I deleted everything that he was a part of. No more myspace and facebook friends, I deleted all of our pictures off of my computer, phone, camera.

After that, I went crazy. I began to crave attention from anyone and everyone, just because I felt that I needed that justification. I had never been cheated on so bad before, as I soon found out I was his girlfriend on the weekends, and that so-called "ex-girlfriend" was his girlfriend on the weekdays while I was at school. No wonder why she called so often when he and I were together. I'm not fully blaming him for the actions that began to snowball within the next couple of weeks, but it put me through a pretty rough patch.

So to this guy, I wish I never knew him. I could have saved A LOT of time and money, I could have saved heartache, and I would love to go without wondering if I'm going to get jumped by this girl in my own church parking lot when I'm at home on weekends. She's hateful and I wouldn't put it past her to take it out on me when I'm vulnerable.

But hey, you live and learn, and trust me, from this messed up experience, I've learned A LOT.


  1. Sorry you had to go through all that. I've been there.

  2. Wow. What a dirt bag. That really sucks!


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