Friday, January 28, 2011

30 Days of Truth: Day 14

Day 14: A Hero That Has Let You Down. (Letter)

This one is kind of difficult. One, I don't have many "heroes." Two, those heroes I do have our people I actually know. So the recipient of this letter is going to remain anonymous, just because I do not want that person to stumble across this and be upset about me putting all the things between us out on the kitchen table.

Dear Person Whom I Love,

I don't know what has gone wrong with our relationship in the past 5 years. In all the time I knew you while growing up, you were completely supportive of me, rejoiced with me in my accomplishments, and shared my happiness as well as my sorrows. But somewhere along the way, things changed. It seems as if you began to stop caring as much about me, and became more and more selfish.

I'm not trying to put all the blame on you. I do know that at one point I began pushing you away. Part of that was because you weren't there for me at one of my hardest moments in my life, a moment when I needed you the most. I just wanted you to ask me about the guy who was my boyfriend at the time, ask me what was wrong, but instead you were too wrapped up in your significant other to even realize I was broken.

I went through a lot of shit after him. I wasn't the same person anymore, and I began to hate you. I didn't like that I hated you, so I sought counseling. It didn't help that much when I first began because I was in denial. Then when I started opening up more and more to DeAnn, it began helping. I begin to substitute her for you. Do you know how awful that felt, knowing that I confided more in a complete stranger rather than you? It wasn't supposed to be that way.

I've always admired you and your character, and the love you've shown to those closest to you, but this was awful. I had never been so disappointed in my life.

Right now, we're trying to work through things, but circumstances are not making it easy. It's almost to the point that I wonder if you are willing to work everything out or not. Either way, let me know. I'm always here.


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